Mid Life Crisis?

Funny, I don’t feel 35…

I feel 26. I’m starting to look like it again too. Hard to believe I am halfway to 70. My grandmother is almost 97, my dad would be 65 if he were alive…

I am the mother of a teenager.

It’s not sinking in. I think I like it that way. I hope it doesn’t sink in.

If what they say is true, continuing to feel 26 should keep me young for a long time. I have been doing a lot to reverse the effects of the drinking I had been doing for years. Now if only I could quit smoking…soon I hope.

I almost met my goal for Christmas this year, which was to lose 15 pounds, I missed that by 3 pounds as far as I can tell, but you never know. ( I am a little bloated right now, don’t ask.)

I want to be back down to 165 by April. It’s going to be a lot of work, and even more working out, but I plan to get in the best shape I have ever been in my life in this next year. I have not weighed 165 since 2005 I think. It would be nice to get back down to 135, but I am not going to push myself so hard I make myself sick, and chances are that the difference in how I look will be dramatic enough.

At my heaviest, and unhappiest, I weighed 215. And I felt trapped inside my body. More and more the 26 year old body I see and feel in myself is peering back out at me. I plan to keep her ever closer to the surface.

Strange birthday this year.

~ by tsukineko on 26 December 2008.